#you're valid too anon

[i-still-mask-because]

i still mask because i am immunocompromised and i want to live. i have been through so much in my life that the trauma never gives me a moment of peace, ive been suicidal for as long as i can remember, my future is bleak and uncertain even now, and i still want to live. i still value my disabled life even if nobody else does. there is love, joy, pleasure, kindness, and creation still left out there for me to find and i intend to find it. there is a better world still possible and i want to be here to help build it.

i still mask because masking my face allows me to unmask as an autistic person! i no longer have to constantly police myself to make sure i make the right facial expressions, especially at work and places where it might endanger me. unless it's too hot i like to choose creative designs to wear over my N95, and in that way i get to choose the face i show to the world. it soothes my dysphoria and gives me control over how i am perceived. i get to escape from technological surveillance in a way that others around me don't know they can too.

and masking allows me to be a safe person to other people whose lives depend on it too. every time i lock eyes with the only other person masking in any given room, i feel hope and relief, and i hope they feel it too even if we never speak or see each other again. we can't always save each other but we can try, and in doing so we can be a reminder to each other that all our lives have value, we all deserve so much more, and we're not alone in our loneliness. regardless of the outcome, we embrace each other's humanity by acting in kindness and solidarity.

masking empowers and frees me to move through the world in a way that honors the value of my own life and the lives of others, and opens up new possibilities of self-expression and self-defense for me. it's one of the bricks we can lay to build that better world. it's not easy but i am proud to do it.

😷

[the-npd-culture-is]

NPD culture is constantly bringing up the one time you got a lead role in something because it was one of the few times you've felt special and you need someone to validate your performance.

.

[lovvecherrymotion]

Hello!! Can I ask for a personal opinion...? I hope you won't mind too much, I really like your posts and didn't know who else to ask :') It's a really amazing fandom here and I love everyone like real friends, even if I haven't met anyone. Some time ago I shared few personal posts which was just me grumbling about life, and got unfollowed by a mutual I really looked up to :") Then few months later it happened again with another mutual. I know not to take it personally but now every time I post anything, especially if it's personal stories, all I think is that people hate seeing it and I should just shut up deactivate completely. I still follow them and I see them making real friends with others, so it kind of stabs me twice I guess.. And even months later I keep questioning what did I do wrong? Am I that annoying, even online where people can just scroll past? I know it's not that serious and I shouldn't care and no one cares either, but it's been eating me up. Actually I don't think there's anything that can be done, sorry to use your ask box to gush out xD I really wanted to be on anon so no one else can unfollow me :') (also I don't think you know them and we don't speak but I love seeing you on my dash). Yeah I don't know what this was either, also sorry to jump you up with this from an early morning xD (You can delete it too I promise it's completely fine, I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable)

hi, anon! i'm finally sitting down and chilling for a couple of hours until my next flight, so i can answer

i think we've all felt that way at one point or another. hell, whenever i make a personal post or vent about something i'm always really scared i'm annoying others. i think it'd be really hurtful if i wrote a personal post and had a mutual/friend unfollow me over it and i'd be overthinking it a lot. while i'm a big believer in curating your online space and i don't think unfollowing/blocking has to be *that* personal, i can't recall ever unfollowing a mutual or a friend because they were venting about their problems. once again, people are free to do whatever and they don't have to justify themselves, but it just sounds really shitty. tbh we're not always in the mood to deal with other people's problems, but if it's just a post you can scroll past, you can... just do that

that being said, i don't think it's a you problem. i mean, obviously i don't know who you are, but just from this ask you seem very sweet. i do think joblr is a very nice place, with very nice people, but it can be hard to get a conversation/friendship started, especially if it seems like everyone else is somehow able to make friends and you're not. suddenly it feels like a big thing you're excluded from and while everyone else is having fun you're left wondering if you can be a part of it. i've felt that way - and i still do sometimes ngl. but i can promise you there's plenty of us around here who love to talk to others and make friends. ofc you don't always click with everyone, but i'm sure there are other joblr users who'd love to befriend you 💜

(also thanks for the very kind words! i'm sorry if this is a bit rambly but it's been a long week lol)

[thosewildcharms]

I agree with you that the show doesn't write love triangle. Even with Jessie in S5 I remember thinking it was a miss opprtunity to show some Richonne tension or Jealous!Michonne but in retrospect I love that Michonne didn't get involve with the Rick/Jessie debacle. Homeboy was dealing with trauma and was in a way I think coming in term with the loss of his wife on his own. I don't even think they talked about it off-screen but I'm sure she knew. 1/2

extremely well put anon! we agree :) as you said, it would have been really fun to see those kind of tropey-romantic moments between them during that time, but that's not really the vibe of that show. and it's so true, i would much rather rick be completely free of his lori baggage before he started anything with michonne - she shouldn't have to be dealing with all of that. and of course, she needed time to settle too! that conversation with deanna was definitely a turning point for michonne - it was about time she started thinking about what she wanted for herself, and i'm so glad the show gave her some space to do so without throwing her into that sloppy jessie situation.

in any case, i think it happened perfectly on the show. that's not to say that it couldn't have been well done in some other way, but that is what fanfiction is for :)

[typemoonconfessions]

[knifearo]

got first "you're not special for not fucking people" anon hate on this blog!!!!! congrats everyone we have made it to the scope of people who have nothing better to do than [ checks notes ] send hatemail to people who are literally not doing anything. HUGE achievement aspecs i'm so proud of you all <33333333

[goldenpinof]

@ anons about Phil and next tour: i'm not airing that, at least now

[egbluh]

wait holy shit!!! same hat!!! this is so pog. its so cool that u and ur host r so open about urselves cause I wouldntve realized its what I am otherwise!!! were like. 7, not counting our host, and technically were all fictives? if only because we became ocs after we ''appeared'' but its probably not the same. im sending on anon cause its from my hosts blog and theyre shy. it sucks that people r bein dicks tho - Z

i'm glad we helped in figuring yourselves out. :)

i have 8 other headmates who are fictives, except for 2 because they're our hosts ocs. and we have one headmate who's a fanon version of the source(bro) and he's actually really cool.

personally, me as a fictive, i'm "canon complaint" and our host describes me as "john egbert from homestuck, but worse" and so is sonic lmao. like, we look into our sources every other time. i am john egbert, but i'm also not john egbert. i was molded to be like him, and i also choose to be him. though not in all aspects, but i'm cool with that. and we won't let other people decide on who we are, and don't ever doubt yourself!(we keep saying that to our host.) being a tulpa is awesome and cool!!!!!!

yeah, the "anti-endo" people really think they know what they're talking about. they're just hurting themselves in the process. they want to be in a community, yet they're alienating themselves. it's so sad to watch. no use in talking to them though. only positivity and joyous whimsy in my blog!!!

[saltpepperbeard]

Just to be clear, I’ve never seen OFMD myself, but have seen a lot about it online. For the necklace, what if Ed did get it for himself, but hasn’t been able to bring himself to wear it. Stede finds is, asks about it, and lovingly puts it on him? Best of both worlds?

Anon, your MIND. Also, I highly suggest you watch it because you ABSOLUTELY, ASSUREDLY GET IT <3

[girlfriendline]

thoughts on... certain players not using pride tape? you don't have to answer this at all if you don't want to, please feel free to ignore! i'm not looking for each player to be an activist, but to opt out of something the majority of the team is participating in (when you already got out of the major pressure of wearing a jersey!) seems like a statement to me! but it is ultimately some tape, and there's already such a smokescreen over decision-making in these last-minute abandoned pride nights. i'm not sure how to feel about it.

i mean, on a base level i'm just really disappointed in the decisions made last night, even if i had a feeling it was coming after the previous fuck ups around the league. it just opened a door to an option that's all too easy to take suddenly.

as for the players not using pride tape, we don't even know who did and didn't (as viewers at home i mean, idk if anyone was there that took note) but we know there was a number of them just from the warm up clips in the pre-show that didn't. considering some of them also didn't use it last year when the jerseys were worn, i'll be honest, i don't think it means much of anything in either direction. and that's not me letting certain players off the hook because i don't want to think badly of them, it's just. at the end of the day. them using a bit of rainbow tape does not mean they support anything lmao. it would have been nice, sure, for them all to do it, but it would have also been nice if they hadn't made the decision to overturn the jerseys - wherever it came from. whether it was one or multiple players, or someone from management, i don't think we'll ever be told tbh.

tl;dr - hockey is still very much homophobic, and i don't believe for a second there's a valid excuse for pulling the jerseys at the last minute, but i also don't think inspecting who did and didn't use tape is going to get anybody anywhere.

edited to include things i said in the tags bc i think actually it's important:

i would have loved for them all to use the pride tape, would have loved for them all to follow merrill and use it in game, but i think you'll drive yourself mad trying to work out who - if any of them - prompted this decision based on a bit of tape

and if you're struggling with the possibility that one of the guys refused to wear the warmups, that's entirely valid, and i'll be fucked off if it comes out too, but the reality is the expectations are on the floor and there's so much work still to be done to change that

[discluded]

I don't know how MA do it. They're the peaceful, respectful and loving people who repeatedly say their number 1 priority is make other people happy and spread positivity yet these couple months they had to endure so much drama and ill-intentioned attacks (fake rumors, cyberbullying, homoph*bic, classist attacks. etc) I feel so exhausted on their behalf cause I know they're aware of what it's been said. I know this one of downsides of fame and I trust their mature mindset to take this bs for what it is but I can't stop myself from feeling sad for them cause they don't deserve this treatment. Tss and antis are plague to this fandom I wish we could eradicate. Mile and Apo deserve so much better from their own fandom!!

[rubenesque-as-fuck]

I like your artsy photos on only fans. If your not reliant on it for income you should just do what you feel like doing.

Well dang, thank you very much Anon! If you're *currently* on there it means you're one of my 6 paying subscribers, so I appreciate the hell out of you 😘

I am supremely grateful that it's not currently a super-important revenue stream for me lately(because I'd be screwed if it was, considering my average sub numbers.) I mostly use the OF income for art-related expenses, when it's not just being cycled back into new stuff to wear for sets. But it's also still nice to get some validation for my creativity, even if that creativity is in the form of what's considered Mature Content.

[toast-tales]

I kind of hate myself for finding vore sexy and still being more interested in sfw vore because the sfw vore community is very anti people who do like vore as a kink while the nsfw vore community is hyper sexual and can get very icky at times

I think I can actually sympathize with you in some regards, even though I'm ace. I think that the sfw vore community is just relatively small in comparison to the nsfw community, and a lot of them have had negative interactions with people trying to publicly sexualize their stuff or cross other boundaries that make them uncomfortable. Or those who say that vore is ONLY sexual and sfw vore enjoyers are horrible people or in denial or something to that effect. I've gotten a few of those, I think.

Honestly, as long as you're not pushing a sexual perspective onto anything publicly or being inappropriate with people, you're more than welcome in this sfw vore community, anyways! I don't personally have a problem with those who see it as a kink.

[onthevirgeofdestruction]

i am here to pop in and say that your slopes playlist is pretty much the main playlist i listen to at this point. it’s fucking phenomenal holy shit

Thank you so much! I know that the music stuff (or the other side content) isn’t everybody’s cup of tea, but I put a lot of time into making those anyway, and I’m really passionate about making them fit will and flow! It means a lot to me that you liked it so much that you listen to it that much!

Slopes is very different thematically from the other stuff we write, and the playlist stands out because of that. It also stands out on its own for the vibes it takes: You don’t find many playlists exactly like this out in the wild. The Slopes playlist also follows a bit of story progression along with the flow, which is always tricky, but it’s so worth it to me. There were some songs in there that were very hard to fit in vibes wise, so it took a lot of finagling to make them feel natural! Now a version of the final chapter has been outlined I might add a few at the end, but as it is, it’s just really feels close to perfect!

Our playlists are writing resources for the most part, but every time someone listens to it or favourites one of them, I always get excited. They take hours to make and weeks to nail down perfectly, and I love it when people enjoy them even a fraction as much as I do! (And just so it’s clear to any wonderful people reading this who aren’t into music: It’s perfectly okay that you don’t listen to things or aren’t interested! I am not hurt in the slightest and respect your wants and needs!)

If you like depression Jams (the whole damn Slopes playlist sure is lol), then there may be a few songs on this playlist as well that you might want to hijack. Also, this one if you like rock and are just marinating in suicidal ideation, it’s probably for you.

I don’t keep private playlists, which means that if you really like music you can technically get spoilers for unreleased stuff if you pay close attention to the playlists (though stuff that’s unreleased aren’t done playlists either). Though it also means that if you pay close enough attention, there are spoilers on the playlists of released stuff too. The Dreaming Playlist is especially rife with spoilers. All Playlists are Fics up until Lööp, but some fictives from said fics also have their own playlists beyond that, and they could also be spoiling all the shit in there if you listen hard enough, too, I’m not sure. Lemme know in the replies if people want the fic playlists also on YouTube because if there was actually a demand I would take the time to do so. And if you’re just going “There are Playlists???” Then I am once again begging you to check the notes on the fics lmao

Anyway I Really love music sorry for the rant, for anyone who hasn’t heard it and are curious, here’s the Slopes Playlist! Content warning: There is so much references to drugs, alcohol, addiction, depression, illness, death, and so on in here! Like Wow! If you were in a good mood, you probably will not be by the time you get to the last song! Unless you’re an angst demon! If you are, you’ll probably be purring by the end, then.

[nursesharkinfirmary]

wanted to thank you myself for the deer icons!! they're SOOOO cute!!!!!!!! nd i'm adjusting alright, a bit confused but i've only been co-fronting with the host or co-host :P that said, though, i think they're more nervous/scared about me than i am... thank you for the well wishes though!! I really love the first and 2nd icons, I might use em both for pk nd sp!!! ty!!!!!!!!! (— 🍃)

— 🌌 anon

im so happy to hear you like them!! i did the icons in a few different aesthetics just to make sure at least one of them fit what you were looking for!

[kinfessionsnmore]

In responses to the tags of the last kinfession I submitted;

The thing is, I am an avid Monster High fan as well and it is unavoidable talking about it at times. Again I do not judge people for shipping things, they have the right to do so. I find it amusing when I also see people hating on the ship with me and Clawd, as long as it doesn't start to get problematic or they start to directly hate on Clawd himself.

Personally I also do tend to ship myself with others besides my past lover. One of my favorite ships is with Lagoona, although that's from generation three. However my past lover is one I hold dearly yet honestly I don't see much content about that particular ship. I think there are reasons I don't like thinking about my canon self (as I refer to the canon g1 Draculaura)'s relationship with Clawd that in hindsight some people don't take seriously like how she treats him like a dog and how that is particularly triggering to me.

Sorry this is so long. /gen

- 🎀🦇

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